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Paul B

A bit about myself,

I was born at an extraordinarily young age, although my memories of this incident are a little sketchy to say the least, I do however recollect some years later I discovered myself to be older. What transpired amid these two stages continues to mystify me, so if anyone can supply me with that information, I’d be most appreciative.

My school years were difficult. The staff there refused to listen to my teachings regardless of my copious bids to bequeath wisdom upon them! For this reason I ceased to grace school with my presence and instead spent the time mountain biking. After being notified the school no longer required my attendance, I discovered a creation named alcohol.

Alcohol is a both a unique and unusual substance that unsettles every part of the body. Due to this I consumed alcohol in colossal quantities at every given opportunity. This turned out to be a detrimental oversight on my part, as during a scarce episode of sober enlightenment and to my genuine surprise, I discovered myself to be entwined within a matrimonial relationship! Owing to the feminine counterpart of this afore mentioned wedlock being afflicted with ginger hair, I hurriedly replaced her with a beautiful non ginger female, to whom I am now married. A decision I stand by and will forever regard as my greatest move.

I now spend my working life within a prestigious vehicle manufacturer’s employment. They present me with authentic earnings, as long as I agree to view their cars. I’m also occasionally required to stroke these vehicles, which is something I consider an honour.